Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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