Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
