we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
