Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
