**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
