you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
