We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
