I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
