You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
