Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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