My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I just want to make out with him forever
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
