Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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