I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
