he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
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