ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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