David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
