I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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