My nipple is on Facebook.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
