R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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