I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
My ass is underappreciated
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
