Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
