i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
