i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
