the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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