Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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