It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I just found a bag of teeth...
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
