I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
