i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
