How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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