Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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