I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
