After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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