your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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