it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Randomize
