a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
