wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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