The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
