I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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