Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
