You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
