"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
