just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize