ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
