I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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