hell yes lets make some ravioli
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
