In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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