your room smells of hookers.
And success
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
