They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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