I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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