who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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