He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
